Tuesday, May 19, 2009

A Game 2 Preview...I think thats what this is

A quick round up of what happened on that long Monday....

First, the award for most vial statement of the day goes to Second City Hockey:

I swear to God, if I have to listen to Pierre Fucking McGuire talking with Wings jizz spilling out over his lips, I'm going to open the vein on my left wrist and drink my own blood before the reaper comes.

So here at Bingo Bango, I have a tendency to say some rather disgusting and sometimes disturbing things. I'm not necessarily proud of how my mind works but suck it, that's the way it is. So while the description of jizz pouring out of McGuire's mouth (knew he was a spitter) is not offensive to me, the fact that someone has the audacity to say he favors the Wings makes me want to vomit. Does no one remember the burst of wind which gave Datsyuk speed during the Winter Classic...or the fact that the Wings were winning the game so it may have been pertinent to discuss them. I think that may be the first and last time someone mentions McGuire favoring the Wings.

Also yesterday, Megan over at On The Wings had a great write up detailing Detroit's history with Quenneville. She also had a nice run down of the classic fight between the Blues and the Wings. I have to say I am infinitely ashamed I did not remember Quenneville was the coach for the Blues during that fight. My blog should immediately be deleted and I should be forced to wear a Sidney Crosby jersey in public to display my shame. How could I possibly forget he was the coach especially after Kosher threatened him with a stool. ahhhh memories.

Alright so on to what can best be described as a game preview????

So game one certainly wasn't the best effort of either team. And yet I think it was most eye opening for the young Hawks. Playing against Calgary and Vancouver has proven to be quite different then the Wings.

Jonathan Toews mutton chops had this to say:

"It's a different game now,'' said Toews, who contributed a combined 10 points in the first two rounds. "Everything is a little tighter. We didn't play well enough against their best players. But we can play looser because it's not going to get worse than that.''

An astonishingly astute and mature observation by someone with the most ridiculous facial hair in the NHL after Getzlaf. And the only reason Getzlaf wins the Tool Gold Medal is because he rocks it all year long, and well it makes him look like a 70s porn star. If Toews sported his mutton chops all season, hands down, he'd win.

Despite his suspect appearance, I feel inclined to believe him. I think the Hawks are going to come out and play at a different level. Zetterberg had this to say specifically about Patrick Kane:

"We can always be better," said Wings center Henrik Zetterberg, who had a goal and an assist and was a plus-3 in Sunday's 5-2 win. "I thought (Kane) was dangerous a few times. When you give him space and time, he will create something. I didn't think he played as bad as everyone says. It's small things ... one of his passes go through and it's open nets. You just have to be aware when he's out there because he can create something out of nothing."

Last game Kane was surprisingly unnoticeable. His most dangerous threat during game one was one of his prepubescent zits popping and taking out a Wings eye. But if Kane and the rest of the Hawks have proven anything over both the regular season and the playoffs, they are a great comeback team. They proved it on Sunday, and now, since they are feeling backed against a wall, I'm sure Detroit will witness their A game.

This makes the need for Detroit to come out and play hard in the first period even more vital. I'm not sure my nerves, liver, or the lining of my stomach can handle going to Chicago with the series tied one-one.

George over at Snapshots posted a wonderful article on the greatness that is Lidstrom:

Lidstrom's greatness goes unmentioned too easily, except when the analyst is the guy who sees the back of that number-5 jersey for almost half of every game.

I myself am incredibly guilty of overlooking Lidstrom. Even in my last recap I failed to point out his amazing play. Watching him positionally is a thing of beauty. Really more of an art form than anything else. As Ozzie pointed out Lidstrom certainly handed the young Hawks a lesson in what it's like to play against the best....even if they were 6 years old when he first entered the league.

Tonight game 2, and despite the Wings somewhat dominating performance during the third period of game 1, they are going to have to bring a much more solid effort tonight. Chicago will be looking for some sort of redemption and I truly believe those little cocky bastards are not intimidated at all by Detroit.

I say it every fucking day, but what the hell, I'll say it again. Detroit needs to come out strong and play hard the first 10 minutes. Completely dominate and break their spirit. What would I like to see? Oh a goal from Datsyuk and Homer. It's been a month now for Dangle Dangle and you know he wants one bad. Here's what he had to say:

"Someday, I will score," he said after yesterday's practice at the Joe Louis Arena.

Could that someday be tonight? Sweet baby Jesus I hope so. Even Lidstrom tried to get Dangle Dangle an empty netter last game, something to break the cycle, but the hockey gods weren't ready. Tonight maybe?? If not, it is still highly entertaining watching him backcheck and strip the young Hawks of the puck before they have any idea what just happened.

The other streak that would be nice to break tonight....letting in a short handed goal. I think they're at 10 games in a row right now...with the way the officiating has been for both sides and the utter cluster fuck of calls and non calls, it's important the Wings improve this aspect of their game. Quite frankly with such defensively responsible forwards and Lidstrom and Rafalski, I'm not sure why they seem to be struggling so much, especially when Zetterberg could open a clinic on how to kill 5 on 3s. Work on the positioning and the coverage responsibility and it should improve drastically.

Alright so what did the Hawks learn in game one?

Lesson One; Cocky little hockey players will be forced to bend over, hang on tight to their ankles, and learn what it's like to play against Lidstrom and Ozzie in the playoffs. Don't fuck with Ozzie's crease, and while Lidstrom is a gentleman, he will frustrate you to the point of throwing a kicking and screaming temper tantrum on the ice.

And what would I like to see tonight aside from a dominating 60 minute effort from the Wings, and another solid performance from Ozzie:

Lesson Two (Hopefully tonight); The art of being Pavel Datsyuk's bitch. Oh it's time, it's time.

Game 2. No holding back. No letting up on the forecheck. This Hawks teams seems to delight in comebacks. Just ask Calgary and Vancouver. It's balls to the wall all night. 60 minutes of pure hell for the little guys...so when they're tucked in bed late tonight, they'll have nightmares, screams of terror, and constant bed wetting as they see Homer's ass, Franzen's goals, Zetterberg and Datsyuks backchecking, and well just a constant picture of Lidstrom.

Can't stress the importance of going to Chicago 2-0. Until game time, stress, lack of eating, low productivity, and a shitty day.

Go Wings!!


  1. I think the Wings were pretty cautious in Game One but now it's different. Wings know the Hawks will play better and will assume they will come out fast and hard. If the Wings come out of that first period with a lead or a tie, I think they're in good shape.

    I do hate when the Wings have to be behind on the scoreboard to become fully engaged to play. They need to stop that.

  2. Is it too much to ask for a good start? Please?

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