Friday, April 16, 2010

It's Finally Here

Holy shit was that not the longest Thursday ever? For fucks sake during points of the day I began counting down the minutes until Friday. Productivity be damned apparently.

At least mserven posted a smorgasbord of pictures on twitter from his day at the Wings practice. I told myself I would attempt to push aside any jealous feelings but I just can't. That lucky bitch was able to see Stevie Y and some impromptu soccer. I'm promising myself I'll go to the practice before game 5.

So tonight's game 2. It's also the night I lose my playoff game virginity. Wait that sounds weird. Nevermind. Anyway, moving on, I'll finally be attending my first Wings playoff game. Myself and some friends will have the distinct pleasure of meeting up with Sully, Serven, and Calquake. Awesome. Should be a fantastic time. We have an IV bag full of beer and a nurse on hand ready to hook Sully up. The only remaining question, do I rock the Feed the Mule t-shirt or the Dangle is full of really fucking hard decisions.

Moving along to some pregame nonsense. In my post game rant or whatever the hell that was, I mentioned that I may or may not have had some animosity for JWilly. I also begged or bitched, not sure which one, that Abdelkader be put in the line up. Well my wishes were answered. Tonight Abby or Gator or Abdekaldkfjelkjsfsdk will make his triumphant return to the 4th line. I'm women enough to admit I nearly peed my pants with excitement over the thought that someone other than Helm or Stuart will be in the line up willing to spend much of his shift hitting Coyotes. Yes this Michigan State Alumnus knows his role and you can be damn sure he wants that spot in the line up and will work to keep it. Williams can sit his ass down and enjoy the Phoenix sun and his fatty pay check. I'm just asking for one big, yet clean hit on Shane Doan. Send a message early.

In other news, when John Keating isn't busy lusting over Lilja he spends his time writing. He's a multi-tasker like that. Yesterday he wrote this piece. (via Snapshots) The only way this whole bandwagon nonsense could have been wrapped more concisely is if Larry Murphy himself became a writer.

In this bandwagon world in which we live, this town, which didn't give a lizard's behind about hockey for awhile, at least for now, is on board. The arena was filled for a playoff game, they had that Whiteout idea left over from a previous incarnation as Winnipeg Jets and, for a change, the majority seemed to be rooting for the home team and not the Red Wings. Winning seems to fix things.

While they finished ahead of Detroit in the conference standings, there is this feeling that the Wings are the favorites. This is Rocky meets Slap Shot here. Their regular season had the Coyotes feeling all giddy, and some of the populace actually might have become fans.

It's a reminder of how good we have it in Detroit. Where passion doesn't have to be artificially created. Where traditions live and continue from a generation to the next. It could be argued that Detroit was much darker than the situation here in Phoenix back in the mid-80's, but we had Howe and Delvecchio and Sawchuk and Abel -- history to call upon -- and knew that better days were ahead.

Phoenix had Gretzky for a minute, but it was an odd fit and actually contributed to the soap opera here.

Now that they're winning, there is a buzz here in the Valley of the Sun. But it will last only as long as they're winning. Which is living on a hockey edge. The Wings will have something to say about, not just the Coyotes season, but their very literal future.

Boom roasted.

Drew over at Nightmare on Helm Street said it best:

I'm still thinking that we've already seen the best that Phoenix has to offer.

Exactly. And Detroit, well last game was some of the worst they have to offer. So in the bright sunshine of this Friday morning, here's how I see it. If Phoenix's best can only beat Detroit's worst by one goal and multiple advantages awarded by the refs, I'm feeling good about a 7 game series. Now I still firmly believe it is pertinent to split these first two games, but it's not the end all be all for this team.

A few keys to tonight's game in typical bullet point fashion.
  • Win some damn faceoffs in the defensive zone. Enough said.
  • Kronwall, Stuart, Abdelkader need to set the tone early with some good, hard, CLEAN hits
  • Everyone knows what the Phoenix game plan is. Play physical. (also known as play like the Ducks and injure as many Red Wings players as possible in hopes of depleting their line up enough to win) Sure the refs will let a bunch of cheap and dirty shit go, but they have to (crossing my fingers) call something. Make them pay on the powerplay. And for fucks sake, bring back the post Olympic PP units. Please, pretty please.
  • Franzen, our big red headed friend, needs to drive the goddamn net. Please. Whatever it was he was doing on Friday, well he needs to flip that shit around and reverse it. I think it's time that Phoenix (fans and players) meet playoff Mule first hand.
  • Nick Lidstrom. Apparently he's still a little perturbed that "Filppula" was able to highstick him and get away with it. Let's just sit back and see how the Perfect Human responds.
  • James Howard. Yes Jimmy and his beer gut will be called upon once again. He played well in his first game and I anticipate him doing so again. As always with young James, rebound control will be key. But we really can't blame him for the massive bounces the puck takes. The puck is really just trying to get away from his crazy fucking eyes.
  • Tomas Holmstrom's ass. Other teams hate it, Wings fans love it. I'm quite sure in a past life he was a high paid stripper. And the Wings will be looking for him to use all of those skills tonight as he backs that ass up on Brydfjslfjsdklj.
  • Control through the neutral zone.
  • Set the tempo and come out strong from the first whistle. Drill Bryaldsjfsldj with shot after shot and get the lead and control of the game. Take the refs and Shane Doan's goonery out of the equation. If the Wings play their game, they can beat their two opponents.

Works busy and I'm almost too excited to write anything coherent. So I'll just end with this, it's a big game, in some ways a must win. No one on that team wants to go back to Detroit down two games. The Wings have been playing in must win situations for 2 months now. James knows how to respond, Zetterberg, Datsyuk, they get, Lidstrom is preparing his troops, it should be a hell of a game.

I'll be there surrounded by some bandwagon fans in white, but also with some hard core Wings fans cheering on our team. I had every intention of making a sign to take to the game. Although I quickly realized I am neither witty or creative and am at a loss for ideas. I also have spent an obscene amount of time trying to figure out how to put the sign down my pants if they won't let me take it into I have a plan. So if anyone has thoughts or ideas for a sign, I'm all ears.

It's game two after a serious wake up call. I'm fired up and I think the Wings are too. I'll try to post again before the game, but if not, I'll be back tomorrow with pictures and LGRW.


  1. So psyched for you! GO WINGS!

    I vote for "Feed the Mule" because he really, really, really, really, really needs to get it going.

    Is it game time yet? I hate the waiting....tick...tick...tick

  2. Never knew Larry Murphy could write like that. So very true.

    I want that deadly focus the Wings had in '08. I want it back. They didn't care 'bout the cheap shit and blatant no-calls (Uncle Mike did that talking for them); they went about their business.

  3. as a male in this society, its often difficult to say just how much i love another man's ass.
    i love your ass, holmer. i lovelovelurve it to pieces, which cannot happen actually because your ass is made of some kind of indestructible substance, fleshy yet impervious to all outside weaponry. i'm betting that if holmer ate white castle, nhl-regulation pucks would be the only result of the ensuing indigestion. when holmer dies, special laser-diamond technologies will be developed at a secret illitch laboratory so that his ass may be cut off and raised to the rafters...

    oh, and wear the mule shirt. he needs a little inspiration, methinks...