Thursday, December 10, 2009

I'm sure it's a joke

Alright haha....last night, this season, the injuries, one big fucking joke right? At any moment the essence of douchness, Ashton Kutcher will jump out from behind a snow mound, and let all of us know we've been punked. Sure it will probably be a big joke and a stubby middle finger to the Wings and their fans from Gary, but I'd gladly take that, because if that's not the case, I've run out of things to say.

Posting has been non existent lately thanks to both work and life deciding to simultaneously kick my ass...yes it's delightful. But hopefully things will begin settling down now, and I will be back to regular posting.

In my opinion, last night can be summed up with one thought, Howard played well, fucking Conk block played better, and the rest of the Wings were about as motivated as a jilted housewife. Wonderful. Not a horrible effort but certainly an uninspired one. And to think, I had hopes of them fully clinching the 8th seed of the Western Conference. Damn you cruel cruel world, have you no mercy?

Oh I had thoughts about the game. Quite a few. But their lackluster performance and the Dan Clearly clusterfuck only inspired me enough to note the following:

  • The Blues are in fact as intelligent as they look. They may even be giving Colin Campbell as serious run for a Mensa spot. Somehow last night they forgot they were supposed to wear white on the rode. (and on a side note I still don't fucking understand why they took white away from the home team. I think Gary just likes to poke and fuck something because he know like the crazy little kid down the road that burns ants with the sun and a magnifying glass) So after the pregame skate the Wings had 10 minutes to fully dress in the white uniforms. Seems kinda shitty. Mick was particularly disappointed as he personally felt blue and red looked pretty together....very sweet
  • Who the fuck is in charge of the it the same person who was previously running the the PK. We need names to send the angry mob after.
  • Mick was in fine form tonight. I'm pretty sure between the officiating, the injuries, and the overall potential for a clusterfucky (yes thats a word) season he is going to shit his pants at some point. Part of Daniels job description should be strapping a diaper on Mick and having some sort of sedative immediately handy...In all honesty that should be a requirement for all Wings fans.
  • I like Eaves on the PK
  • With Kronwall out (tears of sadness still falling) Stuart has stepped up his fantastic play even more this season. He seems to work really well with Howard and anticipate exactly where Jimmy is going to aim his rebounds. So when he took a shot off his foot, I cringed and vomited.
  • It's no secret I was a huge Conklin fan last year. Talented, yet cheap. But all season he seemed reserved and quite. Last night not so much. He was certainly giving it to Bertuzzi all night...and how did Bert answer, he continuously missed the net. He really is a bitch and I hate him.
  • Speaking of Conklin, while shooting the puck around the net, he high sticked May. Despite May bleeding everywhere, there was no penalty. The ref claimed it was because he was in the process of firing the puck. Ashton you bastard you're fucking with me again aren't you? Since when is that the rule? When? You always have to have control of your stick...well if you play for the Wings you do. Anyway, Murph in a typical drunken stupor decided to attempted to share the refs explanation with Ken and Mick. They were having none of it and engaged into some sort of school girl no, yes, no, yes fight. While a passed out Murph was being escorted home for the night, I hope someone checked around to make sure Mickey wasn't hiding somewhere in the hopes of administering some 'old school' punishment....don't shoot the messanger.
  • Ericsson, where the fuck did the kid from last year go? The 6'5'' beast that sent terror through other teams....has now become a 4'8'' little boy afraid of his own shadow. I blame Lebda. Lebda did this to him. Hell Lebda's own dog feels inadequate just from living with that fucker. Although in Ericssons defense he did make a nice centering pass in front of his OWN net during the Blues power play. Golf claps and finger snaps.
  • Desperation kicked in at one point, well that or Ken and Mickey got ahold of Murphy's moonshine flask, and they decided the Wings new strategy for the night should be to make Conklin change out his stick because it had blue tape instead of the required white tape.....yes they even looked up the rule to confirm. It was one of those nights.
  • Wings got on their collective knees and blew a 5 on 3. Congrats, not everyone can do that.
  • Abby's line had some good scoring chances.
  • Lidstrom hit the post...Twice.

But the real news of the night, Dan Cleary sustained an upper body injury (looked like his head to me) thanks to Jackman nearly blind siding him. Wonderful. According to the Chief's post, Holland believes he will be out for some time. Now I'll do a recap of the injuries, just because this gets confusing. Lilja, Franzen, Filppula, Williams, Kronwall, and now Cleary. Throw in Rafalski and Eaves and yeah. Fuck me. I guess Leino will be back in the line up. Sure both Cleary and Leino haven't been producing to the level their talent warrants, but at least Cleary creates opportunities for his linemates. At least he goes hard into the corners. And he doesn't look like a crazed serial killer ready to eat puppies and my dog is less at ease when Leino is on the ice. Interesting 2 fucking crazy looking bastards on one team and they both play like its the ice capades....

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