Friday, May 7, 2010

It's All About The Mule

Holy Fuck what was that? And where the hell did playoff Mule come from? You know what, I don't even care, I'm just thrilled that big son of a bitch showed up at the perfect time. 4 goals from Franzen, a natural hat trick over a span of 3:26 well that alone should have made my night. But the Wings weren't done yet as they decided to shove that broom the Sharks and their fans were waving around a little farther up their collective anal cavity with a decisive 7-1 win. Mmmmhmm that win felt good.

But as we know, it was only one win and the Wings need to keep taking it game by game. Keep the intensity level up. But before we look ahead, below are a few random thoughts about the game to relish in. (Let me apologize in advance as this recap will be a bit more shoddy than normal. I watched the game at a bar with a friend, FYI this beautiful bar has Center Ice, so my "focus" was often interrupted by both the other patrons as well as the alcohol I was consuming.)

  • I was all sorts of nervous when the game began. Despite the fact that AOL Horoscopes gave me the best collective set of predictions, I had a weird uncomfortable pit in my stomach. So when Karen Newman was singing the National Anthem, all I could think of was, damn, I hope I have more to write about tomorrow than the obscene size of her belt buckle. No really, its bothered me for awhile. I swear to baby Jesus, each game, her tacky rhinestone cowboy belt buckles get bigger. I know I am alienating any men that read this blog, but for fucks sake woman, it's not 1985, and I promise, no matter what anyone says, acid wash jeans are never coming back.
  • Alrighty, moving along. The sharks had a few good opportunities at the beginning of the first but after that it was all Red Wings. They were so on that even when Ericsson decided to pinch yet again, causing ANOTHER 2 on 1 situation, it was defended beautifully. But really, I thought he would have learned his lesson after the OT clusterfuck he caused on Tuesday. Will nothing get through this kids head?
  • And then the Mule showed up. I was looking at the live blog over at A2Y and there was mention of Uncle Mike giving Franzen more than a Babcockian stare and adding a little dash of benching to get some sort of point across. I didn't notice, but those observant bitches over there catch everything. And if Uncle Mike tore Franzen a new one, thank you. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you. It clearly worked. Because soon after he assisted (was the result of) the Bertuzzi goal and since he decided that just wasn't enough, he proceeded to score 4 more goals.
  • Yeah Babcock clearly needs to screw with Franzen's head more often. I think he's already started the process. Last night the only significant comment he made regarding Mule's game was something along the lines of, "It would have been nice to have in Game 1."
  • The other goals of the game were scored by Bertuzzi, Rafalski, and Filppula. So Clearly the new line of Bert, Z, and Mule seems to be clicking, if you want to get all technical and shit.
  • Unfortunately it wasn't a shut out for James. The Sharks managed to score on a 5 on 3, but at that point, it had as much of an effect as pissing in the ocean. Clearly the Sharks seem dependent on the 5 on 3 to score goals this series. Which come on, that's like a parent standing up and cheering for kicking their 5 year olds ass in Boggle.
  • If the Wings can win Game 5 and force the Sharks to a Game 6, I am dedicated to creating an entire game recap just using Mickey and John Keating quotes. No really. While watching the game at a bar is entertaining, I missed hearing Mickey and Ken. And I hate that I missed Keating talking to Bertuzzi about his muscular thighs. Somewhere Andres Lilja wis breathing a massive sigh of relief.
  • Darren Helm is a bad ass. Normally that would be enough said, but his play last night warrants a greater mention. He just consistently works hard, no matter what. On a pp the Wings were up 6-1 and he was still diving for pucks. While killing penalties he had a few short handed chances. If the kid was able to sell his soul for goals, he would have had a few last night. A Wing for life.
  • And Justin Abdelkader. Well that kid really has a special ability to piss people off. Can't wait to see him full time with the Wings next year. He just keeps getting better and better.
  • Joe Thornton is a douche bag. I've never liked the guy and after the "leadership" he displayed last night, I wash my hands of that big moron. Seriously, I'd rather take a 3 day old half eaten tuna fish sandwich on the team then Thornton. He went after Homers head, Zetterbergs head, and even Nick Lidstrom. Who goes after Nick Lidstrom?? I'll tell you who, a gonorrhea infected vagina like Thornton does. Many of the Sharks decided to act like the Ducks or the Flames in the third and I just don't understand that. The Wings have been spanked many times, and I'm proud to say I've never seen them goon it up.
  • And this leads to my next point, Thornton calling out the Wings for diving. Wow Joe. That's quite a claim after the shit your teams been pulling. Besides, I thought it was moving your feet and not diving...hmmmm
  • While at the bar my friend decided to leave me on my own to hit on some blonde at the bar. Normally I wouldn't give a shit, but she was wearing a Thornton San Jose shirt, so yeah .... But while he was off Shark hunting I met some very cool Wings fans in Phoenix and just wanted to point out how awesome this fan base is. Great people with great hockey knowledge.
  • The only negative from last nights game was the Stuart injury. Of course Babbles said he would play, and I just hope that's the truth. The last thing this poor old heart needs is to watch Ericsson play a massive amount of minutes.

Great game over all by this team. They came out strong and put forth a solid 60 minute effort. I strongly believe that San Jose underestimated the Wings. That they forgot their first 3 victories were by small margins and assumed they'd wrap this bitch up in 4. The Wings had other ideas.

San Jose won't lie down so easily on Saturday and the Wings MUST bring this level of intensity again, if they hope to play another day.



  1. Awesome post. The Boggle reference totally sealed it for me!

  2. Are the Wings now 3-0 or something when you do the horoscopes? You should do another one for tonight's game!