Well really Dats could be the odd of that equation but I love that dangle dangle little bastard so much I think he deserves his own heading. If I were Datsyuk I would walk around every day thinking "Bitch please. I'm Pavel freaking Datsyuk, you better step off" Not sure why but it just seems to make sense.
So while searching around the web, my sister found this clip of Datsyuk. If you listed REALLY and I mean REALLY listen closely you can hear someone in the background help dats out by singing some Mika. Pin is convinced this is Zetterberg, don't ask me how she can tell that, it's a bit freaky. But anyway dangle dangle seems to enjoy it and bobs around to the music. yeah please don't ever dance on camera, or maybe do.....
There has been just a little talk about the Wings goaltending issues. No problem....please no more worries, climb back in the window and close it....I have a solution!
Apparently in the Griffins game tonight Abdelkadar made a sweet glove save on an open net. (It still counted as a goal since he used is glove) but non the less pretty bad ass. Since the chances of him playing for the Wings in the playoffs are about as high as Hudler actually being his listed height, maybe he can break into the line up as the goalie.....after the 8-0 and 8-2 games would it be any worse? I'm just hoping someone will post it on youtube.
Finally Puck Daddy had a nice write up about Johan 'I score because that's what I do' Franzen's amazing goal on Thursday. It's titled Video: Red Wings' Johan Franzen Supermans that goal. hmmmm I'm not even going to go into what those song lyrics mean but non the less it couldn't work any better in that title. For a few reasons.....
Friday, April 3, 2009
Ready for a shake up
Holmstrom-Datsyuk-Hossa
Franzen-Zetterberg-Cleary
Hudler-Filppula-Samuelsson
Meech-Draper-Maltby
Lidstrom-Kronwall
Ericsson-Stuart
Lebda-Chelios
(yeah I don't know why it spaced like that but I am too lazy to fix it.) Those are the lines from practice today. What the fuckety fuck is going on. Yes I am full of the fucks right. They have been on the tip of my tongue all season but now just like a fat man with a bad case of shits from one two many burritos they've come out. I completely get the need to tweak things but it is scary that we have come to this point on April 3rd. I was hoping this would be sorted out by now.
Apparently Backes also injured Kopecky's shoulder last night. I guess that's where the phrase insult to injury comes from. He won't play on Sunday although if the fourth line has the same ice time they did last night it really won't be noticeable. I think Maltby and Draper had around 5 minutes....waste. Can't wait to see Helm back up here...but wait that means that it will be the playoffs, bring on the night sweats and screams of terror.
Shocking. Chris Osgood will be the starter come playoff time. hmmmmm surprise surprise. I think that was going to happen even if Conkcan'tBlock had won last night. Although as Matt over at on the Wings pointed out, Ozzie owes Conklin a drink or two as his performance last night may have caused this announcement to come sooner. I think he may owe him something a bit more than a drink....
Babcock apparently also brought the Herbies out after practice. Too bad they didn't have them after the game on Thursday with Larry Murphy weakly and half drunkenly blowing the whistle and cringing.
Last but oh certainly not least, Lidstrom FINALLY decided it was time to call a players only meeting. Yeah I'm in 'I'll believe it when I see it mode' So talk to me on Sunday night about the results of this. Lidstrom wears the C for a good reason so I am hoping it will be a positive result. Although I personally thought the loss to Nashville and the Islanders would have been sufficient. Apparently not.
Alright. I'm done bitching and complaining.
Michigan State plays tomorrow! Go State!
That was a joke right? Blues 5, Wings @#$%*# 4
(Unfortunately I had to DVR the game and watch it later at night hoping, for a win...)
I don't really know what the hell to say about this game. There were so many WTF moments let's see where to begin...
I think everyone but Datsyuk, Franzen, and Lidstrom forgot they were playing in the first period.
All 4'11'' of Brett Lebda stands up for Babcock's man crush secretly hoping this will ensure he is no longer a healthy scratch.
Ericsson uses his size for something other than gaining the admiration of the men of Michigan by wrecking Winchester.
Ty Conklin has decided that he is now Dominic Hasek and is attempting to emulate his style by flopping around in and out of the crease...unsuccessfully I might add. That or he is copying Osgood and decided to play out of position all night while also doing an inadvertent Riverdance 360.
Homer woke up and remembered the playoffs are coming. His ass was permanently planted in Mason's face all night. That and he also battled hard in the corners for pucks. Samulesson, Kopecky, and even Cleary tonight were wondering what the fuck he was doing working so hard for 50/50 pucks. Doesn't he know they are only playing the blues and thatDatsyuk is on the team and will just make up for it anyway? Jeez overachiever.
Homer also takes a nice shot to the arm and shakes it off like the bad ass he is.
Backes decided to make the highlight reels over and over again. He apparently decided it was time to join the ranks of Nash and Getzlaf and make the Wings his bitch. God damnnit.
So not only has Zetterberg been having a 'rough' season, or an 'off' season, (and I know his production has been there but it is not the Z from last year) but he looks incredibly bored or stoned all the time. I'm not sure which would be worse? The camera breaks to him on the bench while the Wings are down 0-2, and he is staring off into space munching on his mouth guard with glazed over eyes. Ahhh yes I have seen that face before. But let's give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he was just thinking over the new playoff slogan and pissed that more people are voting for Draper's beard when he rocks the man bush all year long. I'm sure he has some master plan in place to put nair in Drapers shaving cream. At least last night was productive for him.
Let's see what other fucking madness took place last night. The Blues out shot the Wings 12-5 in the first. Yep, look out your window now you will see the horsemen of the Apocalypse coming.
Last year the Wings held onto the puck and had minimal turnovers. This year they are giving the puck away like 2 for 1 blow jobs on Hollywood Blvd.
Whatever, I don't know what else to say about this game. It was far too frustrating. Overall, the Wings didn't play terribly. The first period was rather pathetic, but they seemed to at least be trying during the second half of the second period as well as the third.
Ericsson had a pretty poor game. He's young, hopefully it will be a good learning experience. Datsyuk seems to be trying to win the Stanley Cup again, and apparently if no one else is going to help, he'll just do it on his own. Hossa has been essentially non existent since he came back from going head first into the boards. Hopefully he will be out of his slump by the time the playoffs start. Or maybe he has finally been infected with the general apathy in the locker room.
Conklin had a terrible game. AGAIN our goalies don't need to steal games, they just need to do their fucking job. And he sure as hell didn't. Between lack of communication with his defensemen, atrocious positioning, and allowing the Blues to score less than 60 second after the Wings tie it up, TWICE, it was just disgusting. I think the guys from the Triple Deke sum it up best with the quote below.
"Conk takes a seat on the bench for a sixth skater, and throws his stick down the hallway. It probably has a better chance of coming in contact with a puck there anyway."
The beacon of light from the game however came courtesy of one big swede, (and yes I mean someone other than Ericsson) Johan 'Mule' Franzen with this goal
You gotta love him, especially when he is on one of his scoring streaks. I can just imagine him with the big dumb open mouth look on this face saying over and over again "I shoot I score, I shoot I score, I shoot I score" While Hossa is in the corner giving him the stank eye.
I don't really know what the hell to say about this game. There were so many WTF moments let's see where to begin...
I think everyone but Datsyuk, Franzen, and Lidstrom forgot they were playing in the first period.
All 4'11'' of Brett Lebda stands up for Babcock's man crush secretly hoping this will ensure he is no longer a healthy scratch.
Ericsson uses his size for something other than gaining the admiration of the men of Michigan by wrecking Winchester.
Ty Conklin has decided that he is now Dominic Hasek and is attempting to emulate his style by flopping around in and out of the crease...unsuccessfully I might add. That or he is copying Osgood and decided to play out of position all night while also doing an inadvertent Riverdance 360.
Homer woke up and remembered the playoffs are coming. His ass was permanently planted in Mason's face all night. That and he also battled hard in the corners for pucks. Samulesson, Kopecky, and even Cleary tonight were wondering what the fuck he was doing working so hard for 50/50 pucks. Doesn't he know they are only playing the blues and thatDatsyuk is on the team and will just make up for it anyway? Jeez overachiever.
Homer also takes a nice shot to the arm and shakes it off like the bad ass he is.
Backes decided to make the highlight reels over and over again. He apparently decided it was time to join the ranks of Nash and Getzlaf and make the Wings his bitch. God damnnit.
So not only has Zetterberg been having a 'rough' season, or an 'off' season, (and I know his production has been there but it is not the Z from last year) but he looks incredibly bored or stoned all the time. I'm not sure which would be worse? The camera breaks to him on the bench while the Wings are down 0-2, and he is staring off into space munching on his mouth guard with glazed over eyes. Ahhh yes I have seen that face before. But let's give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he was just thinking over the new playoff slogan and pissed that more people are voting for Draper's beard when he rocks the man bush all year long. I'm sure he has some master plan in place to put nair in Drapers shaving cream. At least last night was productive for him.
Let's see what other fucking madness took place last night. The Blues out shot the Wings 12-5 in the first. Yep, look out your window now you will see the horsemen of the Apocalypse coming.
Last year the Wings held onto the puck and had minimal turnovers. This year they are giving the puck away like 2 for 1 blow jobs on Hollywood Blvd.
Whatever, I don't know what else to say about this game. It was far too frustrating. Overall, the Wings didn't play terribly. The first period was rather pathetic, but they seemed to at least be trying during the second half of the second period as well as the third.
Ericsson had a pretty poor game. He's young, hopefully it will be a good learning experience. Datsyuk seems to be trying to win the Stanley Cup again, and apparently if no one else is going to help, he'll just do it on his own. Hossa has been essentially non existent since he came back from going head first into the boards. Hopefully he will be out of his slump by the time the playoffs start. Or maybe he has finally been infected with the general apathy in the locker room.
Conklin had a terrible game. AGAIN our goalies don't need to steal games, they just need to do their fucking job. And he sure as hell didn't. Between lack of communication with his defensemen, atrocious positioning, and allowing the Blues to score less than 60 second after the Wings tie it up, TWICE, it was just disgusting. I think the guys from the Triple Deke sum it up best with the quote below.
"Conk takes a seat on the bench for a sixth skater, and throws his stick down the hallway. It probably has a better chance of coming in contact with a puck there anyway."
The beacon of light from the game however came courtesy of one big swede, (and yes I mean someone other than Ericsson) Johan 'Mule' Franzen with this goal
You gotta love him, especially when he is on one of his scoring streaks. I can just imagine him with the big dumb open mouth look on this face saying over and over again "I shoot I score, I shoot I score, I shoot I score" While Hossa is in the corner giving him the stank eye.
Thursday, April 2, 2009
He keeps going and going
and signing whoever he can. Apparently Mule and Holland are close to a deal. Wow, I was beginning to wonder if he was going to be able to sign anyone before the playoffs. While the Wings would be lucky to keep either one of them I was holding out hope for a Hossa signing by this point. I had already choreographed a celebration tap dance face off. But it may need to wait until after the playoffs...or maybe not at all if you want to read into the statement below from Ansar Khan:
"Hossa indicated he wasn't close to a deal, but he was still hopeful something could be worked out either before the end of the season or after the playoffs."
Come on. Couldn't they at least be close? Couldn't Kopecky give him a little smile and wink and encourage him to take whatever Holland puts in front of him? Does the koolaid need to be refreshed?
I don't know but I guess I should be happy that at least they are close to a deal with Mule. Everyone kept commenting on how difficult he was to sign before. But I really think that's because they were offering him a pretty low ball deal and he didn't feel like taking it up the ass. Now that he is more of a priority, he's established on the team, and enjoying living in the area, I thought he may be easier, not as easy as apparently the hooks are on 4th street (thanks Mick) but obviously cheaper and less complicated than maybe Hossa.
Anyway I am still secretly hoping for some time space continuum to open up and either swallow Gary Bitchman's cap or alter the course of the universe and allow Holland to sign Mule, Hossa, Hudler, and lock up Leino. At this point I am not sure which is more probable.
Alright aside from that, Rafalski is still out and will not be back for at least a week. Which is too bad but at least he is getting a break. I know I have been the lone ranger in saying this, but I do think he was tired.
Based on how the Wings practiced the lines should look like this with the exception of Meech in for Chelios. Yeah that hard pit in your stomach is the realization that you will have to watch Meech and Lebda play on the same line. Is it better than Chelios being there or just a different kind of bad? I haven't decided.
Also, I think Cleary is a waste on the fourth line. But lets be honest, despite a few flashes of brilliance the fourth line has pretty much been non existant all year. What the hell did Cleary do to Babcock in order to get stuck there? Put his bra in the freezer again, hand in warm water on the last road trip, steal his complimentary playoff beard and dye it Kris Draper red? Who knows but it must have been nasty and not the good kind of nasty.
Datsyuk-Zetterberg-Holmstrom
Franzen-Filppula-Hossa
Samuelsson-Hudler-Kopecky
Maltby-Draper-Cleary
Lidstrom-Kronwall
Ericsson-Stuart
Lebda-Meech
"Hossa indicated he wasn't close to a deal, but he was still hopeful something could be worked out either before the end of the season or after the playoffs."
Come on. Couldn't they at least be close? Couldn't Kopecky give him a little smile and wink and encourage him to take whatever Holland puts in front of him? Does the koolaid need to be refreshed?
I don't know but I guess I should be happy that at least they are close to a deal with Mule. Everyone kept commenting on how difficult he was to sign before. But I really think that's because they were offering him a pretty low ball deal and he didn't feel like taking it up the ass. Now that he is more of a priority, he's established on the team, and enjoying living in the area, I thought he may be easier, not as easy as apparently the hooks are on 4th street (thanks Mick) but obviously cheaper and less complicated than maybe Hossa.
Anyway I am still secretly hoping for some time space continuum to open up and either swallow Gary Bitchman's cap or alter the course of the universe and allow Holland to sign Mule, Hossa, Hudler, and lock up Leino. At this point I am not sure which is more probable.
Alright aside from that, Rafalski is still out and will not be back for at least a week. Which is too bad but at least he is getting a break. I know I have been the lone ranger in saying this, but I do think he was tired.
Based on how the Wings practiced the lines should look like this with the exception of Meech in for Chelios. Yeah that hard pit in your stomach is the realization that you will have to watch Meech and Lebda play on the same line. Is it better than Chelios being there or just a different kind of bad? I haven't decided.
Also, I think Cleary is a waste on the fourth line. But lets be honest, despite a few flashes of brilliance the fourth line has pretty much been non existant all year. What the hell did Cleary do to Babcock in order to get stuck there? Put his bra in the freezer again, hand in warm water on the last road trip, steal his complimentary playoff beard and dye it Kris Draper red? Who knows but it must have been nasty and not the good kind of nasty.
Datsyuk-Zetterberg-Holmstrom
Franzen-Filppula-Hossa
Samuelsson-Hudler-Kopecky
Maltby-Draper-Cleary
Lidstrom-Kronwall
Ericsson-Stuart
Lebda-Meech
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Bitches
Well what an April Fool's day that was. First we have the Chief over at Abel to Yzerman with his nasty little joke. Seriously I read it and broke out in a cold sweat from confusion and anger. How the hell are you supposed to write a blog without using the word bitches?? It was all kinds of wrong. I looked for the nearest open window and began to wonder who I was going to have to push....but then I got to the bottom of his 'joke' and immediately, and inappropriately yelled BASTARD! Yep he completely had me going. So dirty and so wrong. You would think I would remember it is April Fools since I had my own elaborate joke. That's right I planned on calling my mom and telling her I was pregnant. But then I began to wonder if she would be happy, and then I would perpetually disappoint her, or if she would personally fly out to Arizona and go all Probert on my ass at the thought of my wedding dress not fitting. I decided not to take the chance and kept my joke to myself....but not the Chief, he's living on the edge.
Well if that wasn't enough entertainment for the day, the chicas at Hockeytown Static had an AMAZING WTF Wednesday. No it was not another episode of Marion Hossa ice dancing. But it was an amazing video and corresponding picture of the presentation of "The Beards is Back" campaign. Ahhh yes, apparently Babcock has no problem wearing that ridiculous hat and jacket from the Winter Classic, but a foe beard crosses the invisible line....And as she pointed out, Kris Draper does rock quite the playoff beard. Certainly the thing that leaves villagers screaming and running for cover, and like the rainforst, the cure for syphilis maybe be found buried deep in the beard. Only time and advanced science will be able to tell.
Tomorrow we play the Blues so I thought I would post one of my favorite fights. Not necessarily because of the punches or any real significant battles. What I actually like from this is how Grant Fuhr fights. He simply chillaxes and sits his ass done right on his oponent. I think that's how you get pink eye, or at least how that group of college wrestlers spread their ass herpes around...I'm not sure. Anyway, I do know that my sister and I fought in a very similar way growing up. One of us would pin the other one down, sit on them, pull their hair and then try to spit on their face. Yep he fought like two small girls.....(and I know that can be taken the wrong way but what the hell I'm talking about myself, so shut it)
Well if that wasn't enough entertainment for the day, the chicas at Hockeytown Static had an AMAZING WTF Wednesday. No it was not another episode of Marion Hossa ice dancing. But it was an amazing video and corresponding picture of the presentation of "The Beards is Back" campaign. Ahhh yes, apparently Babcock has no problem wearing that ridiculous hat and jacket from the Winter Classic, but a foe beard crosses the invisible line....And as she pointed out, Kris Draper does rock quite the playoff beard. Certainly the thing that leaves villagers screaming and running for cover, and like the rainforst, the cure for syphilis maybe be found buried deep in the beard. Only time and advanced science will be able to tell.
Tomorrow we play the Blues so I thought I would post one of my favorite fights. Not necessarily because of the punches or any real significant battles. What I actually like from this is how Grant Fuhr fights. He simply chillaxes and sits his ass done right on his oponent. I think that's how you get pink eye, or at least how that group of college wrestlers spread their ass herpes around...I'm not sure. Anyway, I do know that my sister and I fought in a very similar way growing up. One of us would pin the other one down, sit on them, pull their hair and then try to spit on their face. Yep he fought like two small girls.....(and I know that can be taken the wrong way but what the hell I'm talking about myself, so shut it)
Ah ha....found the solution
Alright, is it Thursday yet? This feels like the longest week ever. But at least the Wings play tomorrow.
Apparently over at Puck Daddy they hate the new Red Wings slogan..."The Beards are Back." Can't say that I am jumping up and down super excited about it. But it is better than the clever marketing I am repeatedly exposed to here in Phoenix. Let's see the latest advertising brain child of the Phoenix Coyote's marketing and promotion department included 80's night. And no they did not mean Wayne Gretzky's super full and flowy mullet.
Also at this point in the Puck Daddy blog they decided to discuss the issues Detroit is facing with their goaltending....really the Wings are having goalie issues....lets see of the 24 years I have been alive I have NEVER heard this before. But it did get me thinking about what the reason for these issues may be..and then it hit me! (yes I like exclamation marks) Little Happy isn't doing his Hudler cluck with Ozzie anymore...or somehow the ritual has become tainted...I don't know. But some one needs to reverse this shit and bring it back immediately...who knows at this point it may be the only thing to help. (I realize this was a crazy statement but the playoffs are coming up so it's time to get superstitious...it's all I got, I don't have a beard)
Apparently over at Puck Daddy they hate the new Red Wings slogan..."The Beards are Back." Can't say that I am jumping up and down super excited about it. But it is better than the clever marketing I am repeatedly exposed to here in Phoenix. Let's see the latest advertising brain child of the Phoenix Coyote's marketing and promotion department included 80's night. And no they did not mean Wayne Gretzky's super full and flowy mullet.
Also at this point in the Puck Daddy blog they decided to discuss the issues Detroit is facing with their goaltending....really the Wings are having goalie issues....lets see of the 24 years I have been alive I have NEVER heard this before. But it did get me thinking about what the reason for these issues may be..and then it hit me! (yes I like exclamation marks) Little Happy isn't doing his Hudler cluck with Ozzie anymore...or somehow the ritual has become tainted...I don't know. But some one needs to reverse this shit and bring it back immediately...who knows at this point it may be the only thing to help. (I realize this was a crazy statement but the playoffs are coming up so it's time to get superstitious...it's all I got, I don't have a beard)
Is it Thursday yet??
It feels like Sunday was sooooo long ago. Maybe this break wouldn't be so bad if the Wings had won, or had played a great game on Sunday.....but instead I am excited and also dreading their match up on Thursday against the Blues.
Obviously not much new to report that hasn't already been said.
Apparently Lilja will be out for the remainder of the regular season, which does not bode well for his playoffs. Too bad especially since he has been playing...gulp...well this season. I know, I know I am eating all the nasty things I said about him last year and all the insults that I hurled at anyone who hopelessly tried to defend him. You think after all of these years I would just bow down to the greatness that is Kenny Holland and assume he is keeping each particular player for some evil master plan. I don't know what pact he made but the man seems to know things and see things no one else in world does....so who knows...maybe Kopecky will be the next Franzen. The possibilities are endless with the puppet master.
Alright lets see.....apparently ConkBlock is starting on Thursday. Damn....who knows what is going to happen in the playoffs. Tough decisions for Holland and Babcock as they try to balance keeping Ozzie and the team confident as well as keeping Conklin in physical and mental shape in the event that he will need to step up in the playoffs. Could we have another Cam Ward situation here? Obviously not exactly the same thing but his time spent in the playoffs is about as relevant...yes scary isn't.
The girls at Hockeytown Static have a nice write up about the Wings and the exhibition game they will play in Sweden.
And last but not least....oh yes this rambling worthless piece of junk post gets better....is something a little special for all the Wing's fans out there. Everyone's been down in the dumps, just a bit, so here's a little song to cheer you up. I have no idea what the fuck he's saying, but I'm told this is a common song....common to whom...I'm not sure.
Obviously not much new to report that hasn't already been said.
Apparently Lilja will be out for the remainder of the regular season, which does not bode well for his playoffs. Too bad especially since he has been playing...gulp...well this season. I know, I know I am eating all the nasty things I said about him last year and all the insults that I hurled at anyone who hopelessly tried to defend him. You think after all of these years I would just bow down to the greatness that is Kenny Holland and assume he is keeping each particular player for some evil master plan. I don't know what pact he made but the man seems to know things and see things no one else in world does....so who knows...maybe Kopecky will be the next Franzen. The possibilities are endless with the puppet master.
Alright lets see.....apparently ConkBlock is starting on Thursday. Damn....who knows what is going to happen in the playoffs. Tough decisions for Holland and Babcock as they try to balance keeping Ozzie and the team confident as well as keeping Conklin in physical and mental shape in the event that he will need to step up in the playoffs. Could we have another Cam Ward situation here? Obviously not exactly the same thing but his time spent in the playoffs is about as relevant...yes scary isn't.
The girls at Hockeytown Static have a nice write up about the Wings and the exhibition game they will play in Sweden.
And last but not least....oh yes this rambling worthless piece of junk post gets better....is something a little special for all the Wing's fans out there. Everyone's been down in the dumps, just a bit, so here's a little song to cheer you up. I have no idea what the fuck he's saying, but I'm told this is a common song....common to whom...I'm not sure.
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